#TTOD - Abundance Life

#ThoughtsofTheDay

God always gives us wisdom through our everyday life. If we are humble enough to actively seeking, you will then be given the gift of understanding to what is happening in your life. Not only that, He will then also reveal His promise become alive in our life. Then, we will rich in love, kindness and not powerless.

#THEPOWERFULMESSAGE

We tend to always look for blessings
(Strength, wisdom, money, any kind of blessings you can think of )
but we often forget to become the blessings itself.

The question is: What if we are the one who called to be the blessings for others ?

Remember that when you are chasing a way to bless other, blessings that you are looking for will chase you back.

To live means to share. To share means to give.

It's called abundance life.

　

Luke 6:38

Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

Moral of The Story

If you read my post earlier, that is how I interpret life should be. Tirelessly,  I declare that I am beyond blessed. I am given so many talent in art and music. My creativity works whenever there is freedom. If I could use my talent of writing to bless others and make people think and reflect back on themselves to be the best out of them. I would do so. Its never about me, its about how I can open the blind eyes through my works and my talent given.

One of the best feeling above all was some of them share with me that they had experience being bullied and low self-esteem as well. They told me that they also want to write a blog to express themselves. I am thrilled by the responses. For those who read my blog, I pray so that you will be blessed in so many ways.

To appreciate people in their well being is much more important than anything else. To see what you see is something but to see what's within is something and priceless.                                                                less judge, love more.

And above all these put on Love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. 

Col 3:14 

X.O.X.O

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Deep-Res(t)-Ion

A few months ago, not many knows that I was depressed. I was in denial and kept telling myself, I was fine and all things are well - my work, community and my private life. I looked normal on the outside and none shows like people in depression. I was still laughing, talking and acting as per normal. But, on the inside, I was too busy trying to figure out how to impress my boss so that I can prove her I can do as per her expectation and prove to myself that I can manage my time well. I was afraid of what people might think of me. I was so pathetic back then. My whole body was shaking if I stop working. Its because I was only sleep 3 hours a day. I sleep at 1am and force myself to wake up at 4 am and still work out dan diet. So, my body expecting me to keep moving 24/7. 

Then, I went to general practitioner (GP) and I asked her on my dizziness. Surprisingly, her first question was if I was stress or depress. I was still in denial and she still gave me tranquilizer. I put the drugs in my office drawer and one day during office hour, suddenly, my head felt like want to explode and I can't hold it any longer. My emotional was unstable, so I took the drug to just prove that this is just nonsense and I only need a sleep. After taking the drug, I was strengthless and felt peace on the inside. I never felt like that before. It felt like heaven. I shocked and kept telling myself that this can't be real, I was in denial and keep defend myself that I have my faith and this kind of things won't happen. I was afraid. 

I keep it for myself for quite awhile and distance myself from everyone till I finally decided to tell my 2 sisters from my community and my dad. I was too afraid because I did a research on the drugs and it addictive and has side effect. I knew at that time that I have to stop and do something. So, when I told my Dad, his voice was shaky and holding the tears. This was my turning point, I asked God to give me strength to go on and fight my depression. I also believe that because of my Dad's prayer, I can go on just fine and throw the drug confidently (I was too afraid to throw it and planned to ask for more). A little harder at first due to my body has used to it but I am survived 2 weeks later. Every time my body react on it, I read a bible verse and be still-not doing anything. In short, this has changed my relationship with my dad and also change the way I live. This is the lowest point of my life up to this moment.

Above all, I am glad that I knew how it feels like to be depressed. I am glad that God let me to be in this stage. Now, I realized that the older I am, the more I realized how scary the world is. People compete to have power, people pull you down using words, people will only spot mistakes instead things you done well and people will always put label on you no matter how good you are. The world will always asking more of you while actually what you do now and what you are now is more than enough. 

I am blessed I experienced being bullied and victim of words abuse during my school days. Being bullied because of my body size and for not being good enough. I was always care of what people think and always try to feed their expectation. But, since my depression, I decide to change the way I think that its Ok to be who I am. Its Ok to be not Ok cause everything has its own time. My identity not depend on how people think but in My creator-Jesus Christ. I am made to be a blessings and to be a light for those surround me. I pity the people who live in the shadow of worldly things like money, power and wealthiness as standard of living. But, believe me, its never about money, power or else. Life is more than that buddy. 

I am not consider myself lucky but I am beyond blessed surrounded by family with strong catholic faith since I was young. I am grounded and deeply rooted in God. I am sure and believe that my path, my dreams is safe and secure in His hand. All I have to do is surrender my self (to let go), be patient, be humble and always make thanksgiving prayer as an habit, trust for everything that He has done - the good and the bad. Remember, He never promised us to always have a good life but He promised to always deliver us from the evil and thats all we ever need. Now, this verse has become my rhema.

I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord; plans to prosper you
and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11. 

I hope that my revelation be a blessings and inspiration to the young people to live a life that is matter.

X.O.X.O

Blessing in Disguise

I don't know how to describe this feeling. But, I just want to share a small blessing I received. I am currently working in printing company as a customer support. As a CS I need to deal with a lot of books specification daily which is awesome. But, the best part of my job is I have a very right to read all the books that my company printed free.

Then, one fine day, I saw a beautiful book on my boss' desk. When I saw that, I know that I am in love with the books and the cover design. The cover is pink colour with classic design on it. I normally don't like pink though but this time is exceptional. hahaha!

So, my wishful thinking was to handle that kind of books (as fyi, though you see books as book itself, its actually done more complicated than you think! ha!). Few days later, suddenly, my boss came to me and hand over a book which turn out to be that book! while saying, "For you, I thought you would like the magazine". I am surpised and overjoyed and at that point the project have not confirmed yet. I was excited to read the books and happier when I read the books, it is actually a Christians magazine which sharing about who we are in Christ.

At that moment, my condition was unstable. I questioned my faith and identity as Christ followers. I was angry at myself and think that I am a fool to become Christ followers. It was tough cause I lost my confident, I became self-centred and negthink towards others.

I don't know if this coincident or not but I believe God never do coincident things. But this was the perfect timing to read the magazine. As I read it, my faith was slowly return and I started to fix my self little by little. I am reminded my self-worth as a Christ's image. Easy not easy, raise then fall, bright and dimmed. It was complicated.

But, I changed a lot compare to my old personality. I know I will fall even deeper. I could've lost my job. But, No! it never happened, instead, He uses my job to rescue me from that confusion. Since then, I realised that I am loved and this job is really meant for me.

I started this job with a lot of mournings and struggles as it carries big responsibilities to make sure everything well-planned till the end process, to be well-organized person and detailed person which I am not. But, that was nothing compare to blessings that I constantly receives from my jobs. The supportive boss, well-maintain work environment. Everything is just perfect for me.

I learn that if we patient enough to wait, He will give us more than what we thought we will receive. This job was on 6 months waiting period but that period is worth a life time lessons. I know and fully-awared that I am saved in His hands. Thou that long period filled with sweet and bitter moments, I am not disappointed with the result. I am even more thankful especially I realized that I have given a very supportive parent this whole time but I couldn't see it. Now I can see it clearly and I see the beauty of life even deeper.

Now, Looking back, I just know that these all mean nothing if it wasn't done by His grace. and Yes, He taken me into a deeper faith, and the journey still continues.

By His grace I am humbled.

Ephesians 2:8-9

 ♔  What blesses you, it bounce back to you.  ♔

X.O.X.O

Las Félicité

THE GRADUATES 

Happy graduation! Finally you guys are are made it. After 3 sweat years. Congrats! We have passed 1 stage of life. Now, times for us to choose which way we want to live in, who do we want to be. 

I know it’s a little bit cheesy to write this on my blog. But, I got nothing to give other than my time and what I think I do best. As we go forward with our life, choose carefully what you want. There’s so much good things world to offer, be wise to choose but never limit yourself. Take chances, be wild, explore new things and be responsible for it. 

I would say, life is demanding- but we don’t have to be that kind of person. Take your time and don’t follow the world-be crazy, be unique and original. Find yourself and never forget where you come from. 

It has been the ups and down journey with our friendship. We started by saying Hi in the middle of the road became assignments’ buddies and through the times here we are- become good buddies and slowly be the one that I would cherish and invest my life to just share things.

Now, we will have to go separate way to live our own life, but I assume that does not mean we stop here, rite? Let’s grow old together, catch things up and find our way. Let’s talk over tea time in somewhere we enjoy together. hahaha. I am waiting on that moment!! 

Just few moments below. Good times. good companion. Thanks for bringing the best out of me. It was a blessed night to spend with you all and your family and also meet new friends. It was awesome! 

Someone took 10 pieces of this choc!

Meet new friend - Michelle

                                         

X.O.X.O

GodBless

#02 Sharing is Caring - Down on My Knees

 I didn't realized that I am a changed man afterwards.

The change that even I did not think will make an impact.

The right decision but the wrong motives.

I did not prepare for this and I didn't see it coming.

I thought I will be strong enough to handle but now I know I'm too proud of my self

till I'm lost in my own thoughts. 

Pride and ignorance have hurt my self and the people surround me.

I need to find my way back.

I can't keep pretending like I am oke while I need help. 

In the dessert of my own desire, He-yet never give up on Me.

His loves fill me.

He called me but I don't listen.

He talked to me but all I did was focusing on my own thoughts.

He taught me but I ignore.

What am I actually doing ?

I can't even answer my own question.

Then, I finally found my self down on my knees in front of the cross, crying over my faults, confessing my sins. 
Resting and surrendering all in the arm of my own Saviour
Jesus Christ

I keep asking myself, what have I done to myself?

What have I done to this sweet relationship?

I unintentionally burn the bridge between me and Him.

I have lost for whatever I gained